Poetry Drop: Parenthood

A busy week.

So I decided to drop some poetry today. I started the poem a week ago, but just returned to it this morning.

It has been a long week. Good, but long. I have been training new employees at Hardhits with my wife during the day and writing lots of articles at night. In the evening, before the kids are in bed, I am a Parent.

Parenting has been hard this week. Oliver had high school baseball tryouts and he took a ball to the finger and broke it. He is super disappointed. I feel guilty because I meant to take him to the batting cage. I work with him in the yard and I have taken him to the park and thrown balls for him, but with my back, I can’t throw enough. I knew he needed more work and I should have been there for him. He was trying to bunt when he got hit. If I had found the time, I’ve convinced myself that it probably wouldn’t have happened.

On top of that, our Beagle, Penny Lane, is nearing the stage of life where darkness overcomes. She stopped eating this week. We took her to the vet, and they gave her some medicine. But the reality is, she is toward the end of her life expectancy, and there isn’t much we can do but delay the inevitable. I do my best to prep my kids, and they understand, but I know it will still hurt when it finally happens.

We want so bad to protect our kids, but we know there is nothing we can do to stop death and pain. The best we can do is help them handle it. And sometimes it’s hard when we are still learning how to handle it ourselves.

So this morning, I sat down and finished my poem.

Parenthood

You build a house and cultivate a home 
You are an alarm clock and a chauffeur 
A dishwasher and a chef
You pick up around the house and mow the lawn
You are a teacher and administrator
A disciplinarian and a cheerleader
A shoulder to cry on and an ear to listen

First, they need you. 

Then other kids come and they need you. You struggle to find enough of yourself to go around. They get older and they don’t need you as much any more. 

Then, they want you. 

They know how to get up on time, make breakfast, and do their homework, but they don’t want to. They want you to do it with them. You do as much as you can but challenge them to take charge, be independent, and grow. 

They do. 

They become teenagers and their world gets bigger. No matter how good life is, teenagers will want what their friends have. And you want to give it to them, but you can’t. And that makes you feel small. You try to hide it. 

But they see. 

You do what you can. You try your best. You’re tired and imperfect. Sometimes you yell. You make mistakes. You ask for forgiveness. You tell them they are good and can be anything. You fight the urge to hide away, knowing presence is more important than perfection. You keep going. You parent. 

You love. 

Thank you for reading.

Peace & Love,

Jeff Mayhugh